Unnatural Selection

There are many worthy causes out there in our harsh and unfair world. How often do you come across an injustice that cries for an outspoken advocate? In those moments we tend to forget that we have the power to speak out. We have the power to make a difference! I’ve stood on the sidelines long enough. I can’t hold back anymore.

There is a silent segment of our population that secretly endures heightened anxiety during the cookout season. Always, they are at the mercy of the grill-master, who has the power to make or break their experience. All he need do is choose the wrong kind of hot dog. That is, the kind with the natural casing.

“Natural casings are made from the submucosa, a layer of the intestine that consists mainly of collagen. The fat and the inner mucosa lining are removed. Natural casings tend to be brittle once cooked and tend to “snap” when the sausage is bitten” (The ever reliable Wikipedia)

As a child I couldn’t eat them until I peeled the “skin” off. My father gave me a hard time and often accused me of wasting the best part. Usually when I don’t eat a certain thing my father claims that it is the best part, like when I remove the peppers from a supreme pizza.

More recently, I was over a friend’s house for a cookout. I asked his father, “Are you cooking the hot dogs with the skin on them, or the other kind?” His father replied, “What are you talking about?”
He had never considered the difference. But he is not alone. Many people never bring it up in everyday conversation.

So what am I looking for here? What do I want you to take away from this reading?
I want you to consider that there are many people who do not like to chew on intestines. When you buy those hot dogs, and only those hot dogs for a cookout you are alienating a significant portion of your guests. Sure, they can just eat the hamburger instead, but this is America. This is the land of freedom and opportunity. At the very least, have the skinless option. There are many fine varieties.
Hebrew National
Ballpark
Nathan’s
Oscar Mayer

Stop being so selfish. You monsters.

Good day

Advertisements

Posted on July 11, 2010, in Nonsense and tagged . Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.

  1. if that's not a passionate cry for more variety then i don't know what else will be.

  2. I know I don't need to tell you how I feel about hot dogs. I know you don't want to hear about it either. So I just wanted to say hi.

  3. Hi Becca. Of course I want to hear about it. I started it.

  4. I prefer the natural casing ones! How bad can the casing be, compared to what's INSIDE it?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: